Alice Miller, child abuse and mistreatment

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Blocked memories
Tuesday August 22, 2006

Dear Ma'am,
Perhaps you can help. I am 45 and still, after many years of therapy and study, have virtually no memories of my childhood. My body tells me that there was abuse, both sexual and physical, but I have no mental memories. The problem is that I blocked out the good as well as the bad.I cannot remember ever being in the same room as my parents, cannot remember birthdays or schooldays, or any days. This has an especially crippling effect on me because I am a writer. I feel like I have lost a very basic resource for writing. I have seen psychologists, psychiatrists and hypnotherapists to no avail. I feel like I have an entire family of little children living inside me, but they are muted by fear. Any ideas on where to look for a breakthrough? Thank you for your time? A. M.

AM: You are right; your memories are blocked by fear. Have you read any of my books? I would recommend you to read The Drama of the Gifted Child and For Your Own Good. And if you start to feel anything about your childhood write us again. By the way, your feeling that you were never together with your parents in the same room shows already how terribly alone and abandoned you must have been in your childhood. Good memories are usually not blocked. It seems that there was nothing good you could remember.

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