Alice Miller, child abuse and mistreatment

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The abused child suffers
Sunday March 26, 2006

Dear Dr Miller

While searching up facts for a Hitler research paper, I chanced upon your rather famous, it seems, Childhood Trauma speech transcript. I had decided to explore WHY Hitler became the mad monster he later was, and your study and conclusions greatly fascinated me, and certainly was of great use to my paper. However, I am wondering, does it still have an adverse effect on the child when the parents alternate between verbal abuse and genuine love? Will the child be confused as to whether to be content with love, or to resent his parents?

Sincerely fascinated
W. R.
Singapore

AM: This is a good question that I often had to respond to. To know more you can read my articles on this website, especially the one about the role of a helping witness.in childhood. Unfortunately, the last one about the reasons of our suffering is yet only available in German and French for the moment, but will soon be translated.
Also, the book For Your Own Good is now avvailable online free on the web www.nospank.net I am glad, that you are fascinatad by the story on Hitler, I was also (and still am) fascinated by it. For a long time I could not understand why only few understood its importance and import. Now, I understand more: it is because most people (about 95% of the world population) were beaten as children. They very early had to learn to suppress their feelings and as adult don't want to be reminded of their suffering. For that reason almost everybody still says today that hitting children is harmless and necessary.

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